I'm not sure why...

I'm not sure why, or how, but out of about 10 of us, one of us has had a tougher life than most. I suppose the odds were there. I should be one of the statistics. I know I should be.
I was the one with the single mum, who had lots of "uncles", who grew up way too quickly.
It was a tough neighbourhood. Actually, it was a buffer zone in a tough neighbourhood, where the streets were full of post war nanas and young families. The odd state house meant families like mine lived there as well, but we were well assimilated.

So why Debbie? She had 2 parents, a big sister, security all her life, so I had thought. Only now do I begin to unravel her life, though, and it turns Debbie had a drug dependency. Out of all of us, she was the one to fall prey to an addiction. It could have been any of us then, and I wish we could go back in time, and straighten ourselves out, and make a pact to not let it happen to any of us.

Debbie died this week. I knew she had been having seizures, but I did not realise the extent of her illness. Her big sister, who I had spent some wonderful hours with only months ago, told me about the seizures, and possible tests, and looking back I think she knew her little sister was on borrowed time.

I can't go back to New Zealand in time to say farewell this Friday. It is only a few days away, and my tight teaching practicum schedule means I can't dash away quickly. I would give anything to be there with Cherie this week. She has turned out to be a lynch-pin amongst us; unmarried, no kids, Cherie has lived a very full and interesting life, and is no less warm and devoted to her family, possibly even more so than many. She values the worthy things in life. And she's bright, generous, and tonnes of fun. I'm so glad to have her back in my life after decades of separation.
She looked after me so well in Auckland last year; nothing was too much trouble for her. We swanned about in a big black mercedes, talking nine to the dozen, trying to fill in all those years of living our individual years...

Catching up with those girls at the reunion in December meant we have open channels of communication again. And it was meant to be.
I will go back and see Cherie, as soon as I can, over this next year, and we will sit down and reminisce about our childhoods, in that healthy, healing way that people do. Hayley and Christine, maybe Karen B, Alison, Karen L, even Lizzie might be there. And Marcus. I hope we can all be together again, even if just to say goodbye to Debbie, who will be very much missed. I cannot quite believe that one of us is gone, already. We are all in our late 40's now. She leaves two teenage boys. Cherie will be all she can be to them, and is already anyway. What an amazing sister.

We will miss Debbie, who leaves a big hole in our midst. She was a bit of a naughty scamp. Bye Bye Debbie x